the rantings of a crazy pregnant woman... :)

Ok, so first off, Naomi since you're the only person who reads my blog, I've just gotta say that you have become one of the best friends that I have! I love you so much girl, you always make me smile, and feel like I'm a better mom than I am, which just makes me want to be better. You inspire me, and just make me happy :) Thank you so SOO much! :) love you girl!

So anyway, I just feel the need to post about a few different things... first being that my husband has recently become friends w/a pornstar on facebook. He did tell me about it, expressing his surprise in finding out that she was a pornstar. He recently added a bunch of random people to add to his teams on some of the games he plays on facebook. He doesn't have even one picture of any of us, including him on his profile, so it's really not a big deal, but today I went to login to facebook, and it automatically brought up his. And right there on the updates, were a bunch new pics that this pornstar chick had just added to her profile, most she's half naked in, and I'll admit she does have a killer body, but that just makes me feel worse. Now for one thing she lives in Mexico, and another I KNOW that he isn't into trashy woman (not that being a pornstar, necisarily makes someone trasy) but yeah, I know he's really not into woman like that, and never has been. Still it does make me feel a bit self concious, and well, jelous I guess. I know that really I have no reason to be, but yeah. I don't know. I guess it doesn't really matter, and the fact that he told me when he figured it out is good. I suppose it's just my own insecurities, and the fact that I'm 9 months pregnant, and this is pretty much the only time that I'm just not real interested in getting any anyway, and he assumes that because I complain already about my pelvis hurting, and everything else, he doesn't really try. So I know that that plays a role in me feeling more insecure about it all. I guess I should just be happy that he's been different this time around w/actually wanting to give me some action, thank god he finally got over being freaked out by the big prego belly :) haha.

Well, after a night of contractions, and me thinking that I was actually in labor. Then finally being able to sleep somtime after about 12:30, I went into the doctor this morning, to find out that I'm like 70% effaced, and 2 cm dialated. Not quite as far as I'd like to be, but at least I'm getting closer :) HOORAY! But, they found protien in my urine, and my blood pressure was high, so I have to go back first thing monday (so long as I don't go into actual labor before then) to have them test me again, and make sure I don't have preeclampsia. If I do they're going to put me on bedrest :( BOO!! They told me to just take it easy and to drink a TON of water, which I've been doing, and I'll admit I am feeling better (and having to pee every 10 min). I've still been having contractions today, but nothing that's regular, it's just enough to make me stop and notice every now and then. Oh the joys of damn false labor pains!! Oh well, hopefully they're getting me closer to having this baby, and the real thing :) Bring on those painful, consistant contractions baby, I'm READY!! :) Oh yeah, and one super awesome thing for today, was that while I was taking a nap, Jer cleaned the whole kitchen (including sweeping the floor, and cleaning the table) and washed all the dishes! It was SOOO SOOO nice! I love having a clean kitchen, oh yeah, and he also did a load of laundry too :) YAY, he def scored some brownie points today. Then on top of that, we went to a friends daughter's birthday party, and he chased, and kept track of the boys the ENTIRE time that we were there, I didn't even have to say a word. he didn't even complain about it at all. It was fabulous :) so on that happy note I guess I'll go make that lasanga sauce that he's been really wanting me to make, since I just wasn't feeling up to it the last 2 days, and it really needs to get done. Hooray for a happy day :)

It's all good

Well, after a slight freak out w/the whole step b thing, I did a bit more reading, and I've decided that I was freaking out for nothing. I've read SOO many posts by different women who also tested positive for GBS and never had any problems what so ever. I know that my sweet little girl is healthy and strong, and so long as I just stay as happy and positive as possible she'll be just as perfect and healthy as can be :) haha, it's always amazing how much a positive attitude ALWAYS makes you feel better :D

So I finally have my hosptial bag packed, and my car seat is all clean and ready to get put in the car tomorrow. haha, I've been going to put it in the car "tomorrow" for at least 3 days now. but for real this time, I'm gonna get that base in the car! And Jer is actually going to work tomorrow too, (yes I'm just as shocked as you are) haha, he's only worked like 1 day since the begining of March!!! CRAZY!!! it's only going to be for the day I think, but hey, work is work. I'm kinda sad about him going, it's been so long since I had the boys all day alone, I KNOW FOR SURE that I can handle it, after all I had them all alone EVERY SINGLE DAY, (except for every other weekend) for the 3 months that he was working in MT, but still, I'm gonna miss him. I've gotten so used to him being here, and being able to do anything that I need him to do, for so long, that I don't want him to leave me. But such is life I guess. It'll be good to have a bit of money comming in, since we've now depleted our entire tax return. So I guess I'll just try and be happy and thankful for whatever comes :) It's been so nice since I stopped stressing about money. Even at times when we haven't had a dime to our name, somehow we've still made it through. I'm so thankful for all the blessings in my life. I was on Craigslist the other day, and saw a post that a woman did, trying to get things for 2 friends of hers that were both having babies, and don't have anything for them, or the money to buy much. It made me smile to see someone really trying to help out their friends, so I e-mailed her and I'm going to give her anything I can to help them out. Unfortunately I'm going to need the majority of my baby stuff now, but I figure that whatever I can give could make a difference for someone, so why not? :) Jer seemed surprised that I was going to just give away some of the things I don't use, but I've already been given quite a bit, so why not pass on the generosity. :) Well, I was going to make sauce for my home made lasagna (the BEST lasagna in the world) for tommorow, and since I already thawed out the meat for it, I better either go do something w/it, or make sauce. So I guess I'm off :)

Group b step :-(

Ok, so I know that group B step is fairly common in pregnant woman, but I just found out yesterday that I tested positive for it :( I was negative w/both boys, so I never really even looked into it, and what all it entailed. I know that the treatment is antibiotics that they administer durring labor, and since I've recently decided that I'm totally against antibiotics all together (as well as most vaccinations-long story-) I started doing some research. Well, now I almost wish I hadn't because I had about had a panic attack after finding out all the crap that gbs (group b step) can cause, like total mental retardation, meningitis, and death. and come to find out I know someone who recently lost a baby due to gbs. OMG, talk about a freak out!!!! I had been planning on staying home through the majority of labor this time around, since I ended up getting sent home, after thinking I was in labor, and having my contractions stop once I got to hospital w/BOTH of my boys. But that is now completely shot! I read today that to have the most effectiveness w/the antibiotics they should be administered at least 4 hours before delivery, and since I have no clue how fast this one is gonna go I'm a bit paranoid. I'm wondering about talking to my midwife about a scheduled induction once I get a bit closer, just so that I don't have to worry so much about this whole strep b thing. I talked to my sister who's had 5 kids, but she's never tested positive, so she really wasn't much help in making me feel better about it, unfortunately. It would def help if I knew someone who tested positive, had a vaginal birth, and had a perfectly healthy baby. Ahh, I'm sure everything will turn out just fine, but to be honest I'm still just freaked out by this whole thing. UGH, it makes me start to cry when I think about it. I'm trying not to think about it, but I just can't help it.

AHHHHHH!!!!!! Ok, gotta focus on something else now..... ok, so I'm just not having much else come to mind at the moment, so I guess I'll just try my best to stay positive, and focus on the the good things that I have to be thankful for. :) guess I'll post again when I know more.. until next time..

4 weeks and counting...

Well so I actually have less than 4 weeks left now (3 weeks and 6 days, haha) and man, I'm just tired of being pregnant. My sisters sister-in-law had a baby a month or 2 ago that was 3 weeks early, and ended up in ICU for about 2 or 3 weeks because his lungs weren't fully developed yet. Kinda makes you think... I guess even though we're miserable those last couple weeks, there is a reason why the little babies stay in there.. :) But ahhhh, I just want a super healthy and early baby, come on, is that really too much to ask for? I think not! I'm just SOOO ready to have my body back, even though what I really want is my pre-pregnant body, and not my "I gained 30 lbs, and just had a baby" body, I guess the "just had a baby" body will have to do. Ugh, SOO not looking forward to nursing bras, HATE them, and there isn't anywhere around that I can go to try nursing bras on. The stores only carry up to a 'D', uh yeah, I'm not even a D when I'm done breastfeeding, and all shrunken and tiny. GRRR!

Ah, I really wanted to go camping for memorial day weekend, but it has been cold, and wet here almost every day for the past few weeks (0ther than one or 2 nice days, just enough for me to get sun burned) but the positive side to that, is that I'm actually starting to get a decent tan, my shoulders are peeling like an SOB at the moment, but (thanks to my after sun aloe lotion) I'm still tan, HOORAY! I have a feeling that this is going to be the most tan I've been since I got married, and that is def something to celebrate :) I'd love to actually go to a tanning bed (after having my baby of course) so that I don't have such aweful tan lines, but oh well, all in good time :)

So my almost 2 year old is now getting his 2 year old mollars, oh joy! he's been waking up screaming about 4 or 5 times a night, but somehow he's still so happy in the morning, he usually come into my room, walkes to my side of the bed, and on good days, he'll climb up with me, and just lay w/me and smile. he pats my cheecks and says "wake up mommy" when I close my eyes and try to go back to sleep, then get up, and pulls on my hand saying "get up mommy, get up!" Even though I really just want to sleep (especially since he's been getting up at about 6:30 lately) he's just so darn cute. Just one of the many moments that make me happy, and thankful to be his mommy :)

Well it's already past the boys bed time, and I still need to give them a bath, so I better run. until next time :)

Ouchy!!

The weather here has finally started to get nice again, (HOORAY) so we went up to visit some friends and have a bbq. It was such a fun day, they have a little girl that is 9 1/2 months, and really starting to crawl around and pull up on things. She is SOOO cute, I just can't get enough of her whenever she's around :) but anywho, so we ended up being at the park for about 3 hours, letting the boys play, and just hanging out in the sun. It was a little chilly at times, so i didn't really realize how long we'd been out there, until I was already sunburned :( I hadn't planned on being outside so much, and didn't even think about sun block, oops. so now my shoulders, thighs and chest are super burned, I'd forgotten how much it burns. it's been quite a while since I burned this bad, thank goodness it wasn't very much of me that got burned. Gav got just a bit burned on his arms, and his face is a little pink. My hubby even got a little pink. But you can hardly even tell that Brod was in the sun at all. haha, lucky kid, he def got that mexican skin tone (maybe even more so than his dad, how does that work exactly?) oh well don't know.

Anyway, I was waiting for my hubby to wake up from his nap today, he stayed up till 1 AM playing video games last night, and got out of bed before 8 this morning, and so he's been sleeping for almost 2 hours now. haha, silly gaming men... but yeah I was gonna wait for him to wake up before putting my little guy down for his nap, but I'm thinking I need to get him to sleep now, so I guess I'll finish up later. But first I must say that sunburn and all, I'm SOOO happy that it's feeling like spring again :)

Pregalicious

Well today I am feeling particularly pregalicious :) I found a lady on craigslist that was selling maternity clothes, so I went and tried them on, and bought a few new shirts, capri's and pants. the lady though I was crazy for buying anything when I only have 8 weeks left. But I've realized that the way I feel about how I look while I'm prego has a big effect on how healthy I am, and how happy I am for sure. So I figure that it's worth it, besides most stores have discontinued their maternity sections, except for online, and I'm a "have to try EVERTHING on" kinda girl when it comes to clothes. And even though I did pay $29 for my new maternity selections, I think I look fabulous (as fab as I can at 8 month prego, that is) and so, I feel fabulous too :)

I'm really enjoying having my hubby around every day too. Even though he still doesn't do much around the house, he is a great cook, and helps me out a ton w/the boys. It was funny, the other day while we were sitting down for dinner, I mentioned to my boys how much their sister was moving around, and my 4 year old says "Mom, I bet she's just trying to get out of there, so that she can come and play w/me!" haha, then a day or two later he asked me if she was out yet, haha, nope buddy, not yet. :) he's so funny, I'm excited for him to have a little sister. He can be such an awesome little helper. Every time that my little niece comes over (she's 2 1/2) he walkes around with her, and gets her everything she wants and plays really well with her. Unfortunately his little brother gets a little left out when it's just the 3 of them, but they still all have fun :)

Anyway, I'm off to the dentist, and the doctor today, so I should probably go eat and finish getting ready. I'm acutally really excited about getting 3 of my 4 cavities taken care of today, it's such a relief to know that soon I won't have any, and I can just keep it that way :) ahh, well I'm off... :)

differences...

Ok, so I've decided that it is just a different experience all together, from one pregnancy, to the next. Particularly w/boys and girls I think. Or at least it has been for me. I swear I've never felt so non-pregnant while actually pregnant as I have this time around. Even now, I'm almost 31 weeks, and I just don't particularly feel pregnant. Though sciatica does stop in regularly to give me a little reminder... doh! :) But even then, I've been doing yoga just about every day again, even if I don't do much, I usually do something. I've also noticed that the low abdominal pain that I'd been feeling for quite a while has all but subsided completely since I've been doing kegels every day. I used to feel silly doing kegels, but I think they're fabulous, and really does strengthen those muscles that are tougher to get to.

It's funny, I somehow expected a little girl to be more mellow than my boys, but I have found that to be false. This little girl is just as active as both her brothers always were. I've got a feeling that she'll prebably be just as energetic as her brothers when she's "on the outside" too :) haha. I'm so excited, I've been looking through a ton of baby girl bows and headbands. I think the big flowers are my favorite, can't wait till I find ones I want. I know it's gonna be all to easy to spend alot more money on kids/baby clothes w/a girl, and if I'm getting her alot, then I'll have to get a bit more for the boys too... haha, good thing I'm rich... :)

Anyway, I should probably go put my little guy down for a nap, so guess I'm off for now :)