life

Today, as I was doing my morning workout, I realized that everytime I have written anything about my husband on this blog, it has been at a time, when I was upset, and frustrated by whatever happened to be going on at that particular moment, and that I haven't really had anything good to say about him, and so I felt the need to reevaluate some of my previous feelings, and find the words to say how I feel about him, when I'm not upset.

I was thinking particularly about my last entry, and how I said that I didn't have anything that was attractive about him, but that isn't entirely true. He is a good man, I've found (especially in the last few months) that whenever I am feeling like I'm falling, or hitting bottom, that it is in those times that he is so strong, and he is ALWAYS there to catch me, and help me back up on my feet. I see him, and the way that he is w/his brother/business partner, and that even though my bro-in-law, is about the most selfish man I think I've ever met, and that he almost never does anything unless it is going to benefit him, that the hubs is always watching out for him. Even when his bro has spent significantly more of the companies money, wheather it's on going to the bar, eating out, or just paying his baby sitter (reguardelss of them being 50/50 partners) that my hubs doesn't get upset, he just says something like "well, I guess he just needs more than we do" or whatever, it's been difficult for me to sit and see how much more that my hubs cares about his brother than I feel his bro does about him. I can't help but think of my older sister, and how she has always watched out for me, and tried to help and protect me from anything that she can, I ALWAYS know that she would do absolutely anything for me, and for my children, and I just wish that his big brother loved, and watched out for him that way. But what can you do right? I remeber my Grandmother telling me multiple times throughout my life growing up, that it didn't matter what they do, that your family is still your family, and that you HAVE to love them, just because they ARE FAMILY! I'm so extremely gratefull for my family, and for my wonderful husband, and even though he may not be that man that he has the potential to become, every min, that I'm not either. I know that we are both only human, but as we try to achieve our own unique potential, things DO get better, and better. I know that life hold so many wonderful experiences, for all of us, and that all we have to do is believe and that things will continue to get better. I look forward, with pleasure to our bright future, and I know that along this journey that is my life I will make a difference in people's lives, and hopefully it will be for the better. :)